So, when it’s time for the final, they decide not to study on the weekend before, but to drive to another friend’s birthday party in another city – even though the exam is scheduled for Monday morning.Īs it happens, they drink too much at the party, and on Monday morning, they are all hung over and oversleep. 27 Four Friends Taking Calculus Examįour friends have been doing really well in their calculus class: they have been getting top grades for their homework and on the midterm. in math without a job? “Paper or plastic?”Ģ3 How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children? “I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times…”Ģ4 Why did the calculus students throw bottles of hand cream across the classroom? They were investigating projectile lotion.Ģ5 Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach? Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun.Ģ6 Why is it that the more accuracy you demand from an interpolation function, the more expensive it becomes to compute? That’s the Law of Spline Demand. I’ve got my own problems.Ģ1 Why was the calculus teacher bad at baseball? He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.Ģ2 What does the Ph.D. Have you heard about the constipated calculus teacher? He worked it out with a pencil.Ģ0 What did one calculus textbook say to the other? Don’t bother me. 19 Joke About Constipated Calculus Teacher Elephant zebra sin theta.ġ6 Why do they never serve beer at a math party? Because you can’t drink and derive.ġ7 Why was the function so bent out of shape? Its regression model was too tight a fit.ġ8 Why wont Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it? It’s too cubed. Share this calculus humor on social mediaġ4 Why was the parent function upset with its child? It was stretched to its limit.ġ5 What do you get if you cross an elephant with a zebra.
Zorn’s Lemon.ġ0 What is the value of the contour integral around Western Europe? Zero.ġ1 What is polite and works for the phone company? A deferential operator.ġ2 What is the integral of log cabin d cabin? Log Cabin + sea = houseboat.ġ3 What did the calculator say to the calculus student? You can count on me. The guy comes up to him and says: “Aren’t you scared, I’ll integrate you, I’ll differentiate you!” And the other guy says: “No, I am not scared, I am e^x.” Short Calculus Jokesģ What is purple and commutative? An abelian grape.Ĥ What is the first derivative of a cow? Prime Rib!ĥ What did Al Gore play on his guitar? An Algorithm.Ħ Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably.ħ What wild animal is good at calculus? The tangent lion.Ĩ What’s the integral of (1/cabin)d(cabin)? A natural log cabin!ĩ What’s yellow and equivalent to the Axiom of Choice. “Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns.” 2 The Guy Who Knew CalculusĪ guy gets on a bus and starts threatening everybody: “I’ll integrate you! I’ll differentiate you!” So everybody gets scared and runs away. “I don’t believe that she cheated on you.” “What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute calculus student?” Want More Funny Jokes? 1 Calculus Student.30 Two Calculus Professors And One Bartender.19 Joke About Constipated Calculus Teacher.
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